Real Man Blog

On Republic Day, a silent prayer for the real men of India.
The men who put their lives in peril so that we don’t have to.

A friend forwarded me this moving article.  Please read it and
forward it to everybody you know.

——————————————————————————–
Lieutenant, did you die in vain?
http://bit.ly/z01joZ

——————————————————————————–

A dummies’ guide to getting physical with a
girl you’re sitting next to (example : in a movie theatre)

From the course material of the Real Man workshop

The most important thing to remember while getting physical with a girl is
to do it G-R-A-D-U-A-L-L-Y.

Women don’t like it if you rush it, or if you deviously plan it beforehand.

They like it best when it just happens.

Telling a woman, “Come over to my place and we’ll kiss” is not as appealing as
saying “Come over to my place and we’ll watch the DVD I was telling you about”.

She knows that watching the DVD might lead to kissing, but she prefers it
that way, when things just go with the flow.

So here is the step-by-step technique to get physical with a woman in a way that
makes her feel it just happened.

Inside the movie theater

1. Don’t ask where she wants to sit. Hold her by the hand and LEAD her to
   the seats of your choice. Place your hand on the small of her back as you walk
   to your seats, she’ll love that. If she lets go of your hand or takes your hand
   off her back (which rarely happens), no problem. Don’t apologize. Be cool.
   With women, it’s always better to do something gutsy and withdraw, than
   to be afraid of doing it.
   
   What just happened?
   By holding her hand and leading her to the seats of your choice, you have 
   demonstrated the ability to lead. Women are attracted to men who lead.
   ———————
   ——————-
2. As soon as you sit, sniff the air in her direction and say,
   “Mmmm…that smells good. Is that your shampoo or perfume?”
   
   She : “Shampoo, perfume, blah, blah”
   
   You : “Come here, let me see”
   ——–
   Part  her hair and smell the area of her neck below her ear.
   Let your nose and lips caress the area lightly as you smell. Take a deep breath
   and go “Mmmm…” as if you loved the fragrance.
   Then back off, lean back on your seat and continue watching the movie.
   
   What just happened?
   If  you simply ask her to come close without providing a reason, she may think you
   want to get physical (like a typical guy) and may refuse out of shyness. But you
   want her close only so you can check out her perfume, so she’s more likely to agree.
   As soon as your nose/lips touched her neck she thought you’re getting physical,
   but before she could object, you backed off. And now she’s confused. Why did
   he back off? Did he not like the fragrance? Do I have body odour? Does he
   not like me? Confusion is good for attraction.
   ———————
   ——————-
   
3. After about a minute, turn to her again and casually say,
   “Hey, how come you look taller than me?”
   Then compare heights by placing your palm once on your head and then
   on her’s, as if measuring the difference in heights.  Press on her head a couple
   of times and say, “Oh…it’s just your hair…it’s ballooned up and is making your
   head look bigger.”
   ———
   What just happened? You have initiated touching, without making her
   uncomfortable. And by suggesting that she has an abnormally sized head, you have
   lowered her value a bit, and raised your value relatively which is good for attraction.  ———————
   ——–
   ——-
   
4. With your hand still over her head, continue to feel her hair between  your fingers,
   lightly caressing against her scalp. Say “Your hair is quite soft. What shampoo do
   you use?”
   —–
   She :“Blah, blah”
   ——
   You (still playing with hair) : “Hmmm…nice”
   
   Gradually move your hand (while still playing with her hair) to the back of her head.
   As if accidentally, brush your fingers on the back of her neck, while still playing with
   her hair. Then, very lightly caress the back of her neck. How lightly? As lightly as a
   feather brushing across skin.
   ——-
   What just happened? You touched her for an apparently non-sexual reason.
   This allows her to be guilt-free, because it ‘just happened’. Women like it when
   touch begins non-sexually and then gradually becomes sexual.
   ———————
   ——————-
   
5. The back of the neck is one of her most erotic body parts. If she does not object to you
   caressing it for more than a few seconds*, she’s ready to be kissed. Pull her head close to
   you, gently suck her earlobes and kiss her neck. AVOID her lips for now. Then whisper
   into her ears, “You taste good” and then back off, and continue watching the movie.
   ————-
   What just happened? You touched one of her most intimate parts. But because you
   did it gradually she did not get a chance to object. But now you’re rubbing her neck,
   and she’s thinking, “that’s sexual, I’m supposed to object to that” But before she objects,
   you have backed off, leaving her confused. “Why did he stop? Did he not like touching me?
   Is my skin too rough? Why did he stop??” As you know, confusion is good for attraction.
   ——————–
   ——————-
6. After about 10 seconds, lean in and whisper into her ears,
   “I’m trying so hard not to kiss you right now”
   Then sit back and continue watching the movie.
   
   What just happened? When you lean in, she thinks you’re coming to kiss her again,
   and her defenses go up a bit, but then you just whisper into her ears and back off. This
   confuses her. She’s aroused. She wants you.
   ———————
   ——————-
7. After about 10 seconds, turn to her, gently pull her face close and
   kiss her on the mouth.

————————–

Image source : http://www.bollywoodworld.com/

When I coach clients, they often have excuses for not
going out and approaching women.

They say they will start approaching after a certain point in their life.

After they lose some weight.
After they build some muscles.
After they get that job promotion.
After they learn some dance moves.
After they buy that shiny new car.

If you’re one of those guys, I have news for you.

To attract women, you don’t need any of the above.

Don’t believe me? Here’s proof.

Hrithik Roshan.

Hrithik has EVERYTHING you’d expect a woman to be attracted to.

He is rich, famous, one of India’s biggest superstars.
He is tall, has Greek God looks and a perfect body.
He is a brilliant dancer and has a great fashion sense.

Everything a woman would want, right?

Well, not quite.

Women are NOT attracted to him.

His biggest fans have always been kids.*

And things just got worse : now GAYS are liking him a lot.
http://bit.ly/s5Wq6q

What went wrong?

Why is it that a man who is a “perfect hunk” on paper, cannot
attract women in real life?

Because in real life, Hrithik comes across as a weak man.

Watch any of his interviews and you’ll find him eager to please the
interviewer. He says all the right things, he avoids saying things that
might ruffle feathers, he smiles too much and nervously…in short, he
seems eager for the viewers’ approval.

Wanting people to like you is a sign of weakness. It turns women off.

Women are attracted to the opposite kind of men. Men who want nothing
from the world. Men who don’t care about what the world thinks of them.
Men who tread their own path,  whether or not the world approves.
Men who will do what pleases themselves, not what pleases the world.
Men who don’t give a f**k.

It’s no wonder Hrithik’s films are not doing well at the box-office.
At least not the ones where he plays the romantic lead.

—-

—-

What you can learn from Hrithik’s mistakes

Here’s what you can learn from Hrithik’s mistakes.
While it helps to have good looks, height, a great body, dancing skills,
wealth, fame, etc. it’s NOT enough to attract quality women.
What really attracts women is a man’s inner qualities.
Qualities like not giving a damn about what others think of you is
more attractive to her than outer qualities like a great body or money.

———

The next time you see a cute girl and think that she may not like
you because you are not tall enough, rich enough, good looking
enough or muscular enough…think Hrithik Roshan and approach!

* When Kaho Na Pyaar Hai (his first film) released, he did attract a huge
female fan following. But that was before they got to know the man behind
the star. Thanks to talk shows and interviews, people got to know the
real Hrithik, and soon his female fan following dwindled.

Why kids like Hrithik : Kids don’t watch talk shows and interviews.
They watch movies and get influenced by the characters portrayed on
screen. Hrithik’s roles in Koi Mil Gaya and Krissh appealed to the sense
of fantasy in kids and they liked him. Just as they like their plastic
superhero toys, plastic sports cars, and Playstation game characters,
none of which are real.

Why gays like Hrithik : Gays are MEN! And as we know, men go
only for LOOKS (whether in women or in men!).

———————————————————————————————————-

Got a dating question? Click here

————

Question from reader :

I loved a girl ..she also loved me..one day I  kissed that girl and she co-operated with me for the kiss..but after that she said to me, “I dont like this type of behaviour, I didn’t know you are that type of bad person”.. and she rejected me and stopped calling me or taking my calls…one day i called her and she said “Don’t call me again, I have fallen in love with another boy”…then she said to me simply “I want to leave you”….I asked her why and she just said “I hate that kissing”…now what I should do..she is studying in intermediate..was she too young to enjoy the kiss or is the problem something else?  plz tell me sir…..what should i do..I want that girl.

- Harris, Hyderabad

——–

——-

——-

***My response***

——-

My guess is, either you have bad breath or you are a bad kisser.

Or both.

——-

Most guys think kissing is just a small step on the way to getting
inside a girl’s pants.

Actually it’s a CRITICAL step.

It can make or break your chances of having sex.

——-

Women have told me they sometimes decide to sleep with a guy
but after just 1 kiss, they get turned off and  come up with an
excuse. “I have a boyfriend” she says, or “You’re a good friend,
lets not spoil our friendship.”

Or in extreme cases (like in your case) she even ends the relationship.

Sometimes the opposite happens. A woman decides she’ll only
kiss the guy and not proceed further. But the way he kisses her
makes her lose all control and she wants to have sex with him.

———

That’s why we don’t just teach how to attract women at our workshops,
but also how to make love to them (including kissing lessons).

—————

Here are the top Do’s & Don’ts about being a good kisser :

——————————

Do’s & Don’ts of being a good kisser
————

• At first, let her lead
  The biggest mistakes men make with the first kiss is: they move too
  aggressively, too intimately, too fast.  Start gently, wait for her to
  invite you in. If she kisses gently, you kiss gently too. As she increases
  the intensity, you do the same. She leads, you follow.
  ———-

• Don’t be in a hurry to insert tongue
  Don’t shove your entire tongue into her mouth at the start. Sexually
  ignorant guys do that. At first only touch your lips to her lips. After
  she is aroused, lightly lick her lower lip and if she parts her lips in
  response, then slide your tongue in, but just a bit. If she welcomes your
  tongue by opening her mouth wider, slide more of the tongue in. But if
  she does not open her mouth wider, back off, continue kissing the outside
  of her lips. And try again later.
  ————

• Avoid bad breath
  It’s the no.1 mood killer for women! If you’re not sure of your breath,
  pop a mint in your mouth before you kiss (in fact, even if you’re sure
  of your breath, pop a mint).
  ————–

• Avoid drooling
  Another kissing turn-off for women is when a man slobbers all over her
  with his saliva. Make sure your mouth is not overly wet. If it is, swallow
  your saliva before kissing.
  ———–

• Hold her head like a man
  A sensual way to kiss a woman is to hold her head and neck in such a way
  that her head relaxes into your hands. It’s a masculine gesture, it’s like
  taking charge of the moment, and women are turned on by that.
  ————

• Don’t plan ahead, stay in the moment
  For men a kiss is just a step that takes him closer to sex. But for a woman,
  a kiss can be complete by itself, she can be fulfilled by just a great kiss.
  Even if you’re kissing with the hope of getting inside her pants, don’t make
  it obvious. Women can tell when a man is scheming his next “move” as he
  kisses her. Enjoy the moment.  Enjoy the kiss for the kiss itself without
  expecting to go further, and it will help you actually get further. ;)
  ————

• Advanced tip : delay the kiss
  A good move before you start kissing her is to show that you’re in no
  hurry. Gently push any hair out of her face; it makes her feel that you
  really want to see all of her face, which makes her feel good and more
  responsive to your kiss. Another idea is to tell her, “I won’t kiss you,
  I’ll just smell you” then smell her face and neck with your nose and lips
  grazing (barely!) her skin, while you whisper, “Mmmm, you smell good”.
  Then, when she’s really aroused, you start kissing her.

————–

About the girl you’re interested in, my frank advice :  forget her and move on.

A woman doesn’t forget (or forgive) a bad kiss.

Don’t worry, there’s plenty more fish in the sea.

—————————-

———

Got a dating question? Click here

———

——–

——

————

Question from reader :

Hi I am madly in love with a girl. But there is this Academic barrier that is holding me back to ask her out, she is my neighbor she talks to me but when ever she meets I only keep on staring at her like a dumb guy and don’t know what to say! I just can’t understand how to express my feelings to her and tell that how much she means to me. But somehow I managed to ask her for her number, which she gave me. I sent her a message but she has not replied. Now I don’t know how to take things further. :( Please help me I’ll be really GRATEFUL to you.

- Sam, mumbai

——–

——-

——-

***My response***

——-

If you’ve been following this blog you would know that you should NEVER
“express your feelings” or tell a girl “how much she means” to you.

N-E-V-E-R.

——

If you have feelings for her,  SHOW her, don’t TELL her.

Mooch her neck, fondle her breasts, pin her down and f**k her hard.

SHOW with actions that you like her, don’t TELL with words.

Of course you can’t do this until you first attract her and get close.

——-

You asked me for help on how to take things forward on the phone.

But from your mail it seems you don’t understand the BASICS of attraction.

Look, I cannot just give you magic WORDS to tell her.

If you don’t understand WHY the words work, they WON’T work.

Read my previous posts to understand the basics.

———-

Also you have not provided sufficient info. Like, how did you get her
number, what exactly did you say? What exactly was the message
you sent her? Dude, without sufficient data, I cannot help.

Anybody sending me a question, please provide as much info as possible.
Unless I fully understand your situation I cannot help you.

Attend this upcoming teleseminar, ask me your question live on the phone,
get an instant solution to your dating problem.

——-

We have time for one more question. Next question please!

——-

—-

Question from reader :

Hey Shiva, I used to live in a small town, where everybody knew everybody. Hence it was difficult to approach girls, as its in my head that she’ll discuss with other girls that I approached, and that’s not good for my future approaches. The other problem is when I did get a chance and approached, a lot of girls were nervous/socially awkward (I’m fairly good looking). So I thought ok fine, lets see if I can change city, I did change the city, but this new place is still small, and more conservative with a different language, hence more difficult to open. And its in a guy’s head that if other guys saw me approaching, they’ll beat me up. In my hometown I had friends, so was less fearful, only social fear, but here there’s a physical danger too. The town is in Maharashtra, so any way to improve upon the situation, or do I have to go to Pune every Sunday?

- B, Ahmednagar

——–

——-

——-

***My response***

——-

Here’s the plain truth.

If you want options with women, you HAVE TO APPROACH.

No ifs, no buts, no maybes.

It doesn’t matter if people are watching or they know you or
gossip about you or beat you up or whatever…

You have to approach.

Hey, can’t you risk some beating in the quest for a soulmate?

Come on!

———–

And now for the good news.

———–

• Good news 1 : Even if a girl is not interested in talking to you, or
  she has a boyfriend or is married, she is almost always flattered that
  you approached her; even if she does not show it.
  ————–
• Good news 2 : Just because you approach a girl, people will not
  assume you’re flirting with her. Example : If you approach a girl to
  ask for directions,  will bystanders think you’re hitting on her?
  Would you be scared they’ll beat you up? Would you be worried
  that people will gossip about you?  Of course not. People’s response
  depends on the girl’s response. If she reacts in disgust, people get
  concerned and may intervene. But if she responds positively,
  people assume you know her, and they get back to their busy
  lives leaving you both alone.

  ——————-

In our bootcamps, we start with a conversation opener that
intrigues the girls, that makes them laugh, and makes them
want to talk to us.

Of course, there will always be women who don’t talk to us and
walk away, but none of them (NOT A SINGLE one of them) gets
disgusted or horrified. They simply walk away, often flattered
that we approached.

So we never* have a situation where the girl gets offended or
creates a scene.

——–

So, that’s what you have to do. Approach in a way that makes the girl
respond positively. At least make sure she doesn’t react with
disgust or recoils in horror.

——-

Keep these basics in mind  :

• Approach with a smile. It doesn’t matter if you don’t feel like
  smiling, just fake it, she won’t know the difference.
  ——-
• Approach over your shoulder. Don’t approach face to face, it
  makes women very uncomfortable. Approach over your shoulder,
  and face her only after she begins responding, not before.
  ——-
• Come from a fun place. The mistake most guys make is appear
  serious while they approach, as if they need the girl to bring fun into
  his life. This creeps the girl out. Before you approach, she should see
  you already having fun, either laughing with friends or into your phone.

—————-

Use one of the many openers I have shared on this blog.

Make her laugh. Tease her a bit. Then say, you have to go,
and ask for her number or email address.

Remember, all you need to do is collect her contact details.
Don’t tell her you like her, or that she is cute, or that you have
feelings for her etc.

Just collect her contacts and leave.

Then take things forward on the phone without anybody in
the world knowing what’s going on.

————–

* Btw, if a girl does ever create a scene, it’s because of HER issues.
She may be on psychiatric drugs,  she could have self-esteem
issues, she could have a suspicious boyfriend who has a detective
following her all over and she wants the detective to ‘see’ that she
did not enjoy the interaction…whatever…it’s not our problem,
we just say “Pleasure meeting you” and move on.

—————————-

———

Got a dating question? Click here

———

——

Question from reader :

Hi Shiva, thanks for your great tips. They have really helped me to reach from the ditch to the top. But I still have couple of hesitations ( I know you would say forget about them). I can talk to girls who are friends of my friends, flirt with them and I’ve been able to sleep with some of them.

But when it comes to girls who are 1) working in my office  or 2) girls who are already in relationship, I cant talk to them.  About office colleagues I know that I have to work with them so if things wont work out it will be awkward, and about the girls who are already in relationship should I make move when they are already engaged. If your answer is yes then please give me a simple example.

- A.A., Mumbai——–
——-

——-

***My response***

——-

So you can talk to women, create attraction and have sex with them.

That’s awesome.

——-

But you’re reluctant to do it with female colleagues at work. That’s
probably a good thing. An office affair is not a great idea. If things go
bad and you are no more a couple, it’s usually awkward interacting
with her. And that affects the company’s productivity. Not cool.

———-

My advice : flirt with your female colleagues, make them attracted to
you, but don’t sleep with them. Just use them for practice.

In fact it’s easy to practice your game on a woman that you don’t want
to sleep with. Wanting nothing from a woman is a great mindset to have
while running game.

You could also go out with her and meet her girlfriends, and get a whole
new set of women to play with. ;)

You could also take along one of your single guy friends and set him up
with your female colleague while you run your game on her girlfriends
(of course, make sure you teach him some attraction basics first).

Another fun thing to do is tell your female colleague, “We need to find
you a cool boyfriend” then take her to a club* and play a game of
matchmaking. She points out a hot guy and you bring him over and help
them meet (girls have approach anxiety too).  Then you switch, and she
brings over the hottie you point out.

——–

About girls who are engaged to be married.

Wtf  dude?! You have the skill to talk yourself into single girls’ panties.
But you’re more interested in girls who are engaged?!

Now you’re being the TYPICAL male : less interested in the girls you can get
and more interested in that ONE girl who is a challenge.

Get over it. Don’t play with the emotions of a girl who is committed to a guy,
when you’re clearly not serious about her. It’ll just be bad karma all around.

Why go after women in a relationship, when there are plenty of quality
single girls.

Remember, this is a skill that gives you great power. And with great
power comes great responsibility.

———

—————————-

We could have a bootcamp in Afghanistan.

——

We could approach hotties like these.

———-

———-

We could flirt with them, create attraction and have instant
dates at coffee shops.

———

And if we can’t get them to our hotel rooms immediately,
we could at least get their phone numbers.

——

There’s just one little problem though.

——

We would have to do some explaining to these gentlemen.

———-

———-

So, umm, no bootcamps in Afghanistan for, er, now.

——-

But if you’d like a Real Man Bootcamp anywhere else in the world,
write to us here and we just might announce it!

——–

Announcing winter Bootcamps in
Bangalore, Delhi and Mumbai.

Click here for details and to register

Limited seats, act fast!

————

———

Announcing winter Bootcamps in Bangalore,
Delhi and Mumbai (request your city)

Learn to approach women anytime, anywhere

————

———

Click here for details and to register

Limited seats, act fast!

——————————————————————————————-

Request a bootcamp in your city : Click here

——-

—————–

———-

When you go out with a girl, carry a knife.

———

Carrying a weapon says a few things about you that are great for attraction.

———

• It says you probably live a dangerous life; and that
  intrigues her. Intrigue and mystery is good for attraction.
  ———
• It says you have the courage to fight the bad guys.
  ———
• It says you’re willing to take risks.
  ———
• It says you protect your loved ones.
  ———
• It makes her feel safe with you.

———

Every high-value male in the history of the world has always
carried some physical weapon on his person.

———

These powerful leaders hardly ever needed a personal weapon because
they had an army of bodyguards protecting them all the time.

But they realized the importance of a weapon to project an alpha, high-value persona.

———

If you think times have changed, and we live in a safer world now,
open any newspaper and browse the Crimes section.

———

Remember this recent crime that shocked us all? http://bit.ly/ptHgrc

If even one of the 4 victims had carried a weapon, all 4 of them would
have been alive today.

—–

In most of the crimes, the victims are unarmed and totally vulnerable.
When faced with a threatening situation, just reaching into your pocket
and bringing out a weapon (any weapon, any size) is usually enough to
make the attacker back off.

——–

When you’re out with a girl it’s your responsibility to protect her.

Carry a little knife. And let her casually know that you’re carrying one.

Tell her you always carry one, to protect your friends and loved ones.

If she asks to see it say, “it’s not a toy”,  and continue with the conversation.

If she insists, take it out, show it to her and put it back calmly.

Then continue with the conversation as if it’s no big deal.

This will increase her attraction for you.

———

It could also save your life.

——–

———

I hear Sajid and Jacqueline are now an item.

———

Photo © www.entertainment.oneindia.in/

—————

I also hear that Sajid has become over-protective of her,
taking her away to his van in between shots.

Not good.

——–
I also hear that people on the sets of Sajid’s film shoot
refer to her as “bhaabi”.

Not good at all.

———

And now I  hear he has met her parents to discuss their marriage.

Ouch!

———

These are the classic signs of a weak man.

He puts beautiful women on a pedestal and treats them as extra-special.
He becomes over-protective of her. He won’t get physical with her because
he doesn’t want her to think he is like all the other guys (he wants her to
think he is different!). And he focuses on building a relationship with
her (girlfriend, marriage etc.) because he thinks that’s the only way he
can get to have sex with her.

———

My gut-feel says they have not had sex. Not even kissed.

———

You may think women prefer men like these, who avoid getting physical.

Truth is, women run away from such men.

——-

It makes a woman uncomfortable when you don’t have
sex with her and YET treat her as extra-special.

In fact, what keeps a woman attracted is when you do the
opposite : have mindblowing sex with her without treating
her as extra-special.

——-

My guess is Jacqueline will leave Sajid soon.

——-

You probably think this one is an easy prediction to make.

After all Sajid is butt-ugly and Jacqueline is gorgeous.

——–

But a guy doesn’t have to be good looking to attract a beautiful girl.

If you’ve been following this blog you’d know this already.

——

And here’s more proof.

———-

Would  you believe the woman on the left would be attracted to the sack
of potatoes on the right ? (and no, that’s not his package,  it’s the lower half
of his paunch).

——-

Stunningly gorgeous Sridevi, in the prime of her youth and fame could have
married any of the scores of young, single, Indian business tycoons who
were wooing her from all over the world.

——-

Yet, she fell head over heels in love with a butt-ugly, fat, balding,
already-married Boney Kapoor.

And became his wife!

———-

Boney Kapoor did not need great looks to get Sridevi because
he understood attraction.

————

But Sajid doesn’t.

———

Jacqueline will dump Sajid not because he is ugly.

But because he does not understand attraction.

——-

———